Alleyah's twisted world

How you feel is a result of what you do

2012-01-10T16:55:00.000+02:00

Even if we talk about school, job or relationships, I came to the conclusion that this is sort of an axiom. The trick is that this doesn't mean "how you feel now is a result of what you do now" but is more like "how you feel now is a result of what you did yesterday, and last week and last month". This is about delayed gratification, and I believe is part of growing up: being able to accept that there is time for love and time for work, time for waking up at 11 and time for waking up at 6 etc. etc.

If I send a lousy paper today, I will most likely won't feel bad today, I will feel bad two weeks later when I receive a lousy grade on it. If I have a fight with my lover today, we'll probably manage to make up, but the fight remains there, in the background and undermines our trust for longer time.

Being a child is easy, everything happens here and now, and the time horizonts are difuse and unimportant. Growing up means accepting that nothing happens here and now and that things do not happen because of the moon, zodiac or ancient Gods, but that what you do today has a consequence on how you will feel later on, how your career will be like and how your relationships with others will be like. Growing up means taking responsibility on what you do and how you feel. Is working hard now, for feeling better later, building trust every single now for having trust later. And is not the easyiest thing in the world, but what I believe is that refusing to grow up might turn up to be even harder.

Day 3 . . . Rotterdam (without Rotterdam)

2011-11-22T00:39:00.001+02:00

Today was too foggy to take pictures. They all would have looked like this one:

But tonight, something interesting happened. While going by car to have dinner, I could still distinguish this message written with neon letters on a building:

"I have to change in order to stay the same"

Nice thought to end a day with.

To the ocean . . . Day 2

2011-11-21T11:03:00.000+02:00

Hague is a marvelous city. Didn't manage to see much, the fog was very dense, and wandering around felt like exploring one of those whitchy, magic lands :) But I reached the ocean, Alex said that is not actually the ocean, but the Nordic Sea . . . I even tasted it . . . I would say it tastes like an ocean. If it tastes like an ocean, is an ocean, isn't it? :D

To the ocean . . Day 1

2011-11-20T13:05:00.001+02:00

Luxembourg in 3 hours. Differdange. Belval Universite. Grund. Fabulous HotChocSpoons (aka hot chocolate) in front of the Palace. Wandering the streets. Delicious warm soup at "a la soupe".

Rainy, Foggy, Sleepy

2011-11-17T16:23:00.001+02:00

Just to be clear, the exams were not invented for you to feel good about yourself. Get over it.

I just came out of a 3.5 h statistics exam and I feel pretty exhausted.

Let's just listen to some "rainy, foggy, sleepy" music, take some rest and then, back in business, because tomorrow is not just another day, is also another day with statistics exam scheduled.

Kings of Convenience Youtube Playlist

And they are the Kings of Convenience:

Pomodoring

2011-11-15T20:51:00.001+02:00

Two weeks ago I wrote about how I was struggling to make myself a "system".

Today, I can gladly say that after two weeks of research and reading I finally found something that seems to work for me. The magic formula is called Pomodoro Technique. :)

What was the problem in the first place?

Well, as a masters' student, aiming for a PhD, time is always a problem. There are piles of academic texts on my desk all the time, and whenever I see them, I tend to panic and ask myself "when the hell am I supposed to read all these?". I don't know how panic works for you, but in my world, panic is the good sister of procrastination. Up to that particular point, when I really freak out, and panic becomes that thing which makes me dumb. Really dumb. That dumb, that I can barely understand a comic book written for 10 years old. That dumb. By the way, talking about comic books, I would recommend one I've recently discovered: Diary of a Wimpy Kid - A novel in Cartoons (Jeff Kinney) :).

How did Pomodoro changed my world?

I think the most important thing is that allowed me to monitor my work. In just four days of using it, I figured out quite accurately which was my ACTUAL reading speed (about speed reading and other dragons I will write in another episode :) ). And even more, allowed me to make projections. Uh, isn't that a nice word? At least I can calculate, considering the lowest speed (I prefer to overestimate the time needed) how long would it take to kill the monster (please read: to read the longest text that lies on my desk these days). Furthermore, this is a great thing because helps me prioritize and plan my work time for, let's say, preparing an exam.

For those who are curious, my personal reading speed in English (which is not my native language), for academic texts, ranges between 12 and 20 pages per hour.

Just to be clear, I don't give the numbers to brag. I actually believe that I am a really slow reader, and I would be glad to improve this. I give the numbers, because of this strange belief that haunts me: in which concerns the reading speed, the academic performance and the romantic relationships people tend to "lie" in the more favorable direction in order to look fast, smart and happy in the eyes of the others. But the truth might be that they put a little bit more work in these than they would actually admit.

I feel that feeding these perfection myths is harmful for everyone, as Enrique, my Mexican colleague, once remarked: these myths make people want to work less and achieve more, and if this doesn't work people simply become frustrated and demotivated. So, let's be honest: which is your reading speed?

Systems

2011-11-01T21:57:00.001+02:00

It is already two years since me and A. were first talking about "systems". To be clear, in this context it is nothing related to some scientific concept. I just realized today, again, that I need a "system". Some sort of system that wouldn't let me wander.
I tend to wander all the time. Glittering things easily distract me from what is really important.
Now seriously, have you ever wondered what is really important? For me is important not to disappoint myself, is important to have a sharp mind and consistent arguments, it's important to have time to work and time to love, is important to enjoy things rather than not to enjoy them. And I believe more and more that these cannot be achieved without a "system".
I started today, again, to think about organizing my life in a way that would both fit my personality and get the best out of it. For the beginning I made this account on http://42goals.com and I'm curious to see if monitoring my behaviour would eventually help me improve it.

Why counting is political

2011-09-30T12:22:00.000+03:00

1. Counting requires decision about categorizing, about what ( or whom) to include and exclude.

2. Measuring any phenomenon implicitly creates norms about how much is too little, too much or just right.

3. Numbers can be ambiguous, and so leave room for political struggles to control their interpretation.

4. Numbers are used to tell stories, such as stories of decline.

5. Numbers can create the illusion that a very complex and ambiguous phenomenon is simple, countable and precisely defined.

6. Numbers can create political communities out of people who share some trait that has been counted.

7. Counting can aid negotiation and compromise, by making intangible qualities seem divisible.

8. Numbers, by seeming so precise, help bolster the authority of those who count.

(Stone, Policy Paradox, 2002)

The 3 A's of Awsomenes

2011-05-03T09:25:00.002+03:00

Am inceput de cateva zile programul "1 TED pe zi"

Filmul de azi este foarte emotionant si motivational:

Later edit: http://1000awesomethings.com/

Finante personale - Regula degetului mare

2011-03-17T12:37:00.005+02:00

Ma preocupa de ceva vreme problema finantelor personale. Cata vreme eram in facultate, locuiam in camin si finantele mele proveneau in proportie de 70% de la parinti, chestiunea organizarii banilor nu parea sa ridice mari probleme. Acum insa, lucrurile s-au schimbat putin, primesc lunar 5 facturi de la diversii furnizori de utilitati si servicii, salariul nu vine intotdeauna lunar (natura jobului, sa zicem asa :) ), am inceput sa gatesc, mai ales spre sfarsitul lunii cand sanwichul de 10 lei nu mai pare chiar asa ieftin. E un efort personal pe care il fac incercand sa gasesc o solutie viabila in ceea ce privese managementul finantelor personale intr-un fel in care problema banilor sa devina o chestiune mai putin stresanta. Si am ajuns sa accept ca e o chestiune de disciplina si prioritizare: chiar ai nevoie de toate acele nimicuri pe care arunci banii? sau mai degraba te-ai simti mai relaxat avand un micut cont de economii, datorii zero si relatii sanatoase cu cei apropiati? (da, breaking news, lipsa banilor erodeaza relatii, i've seen that).

Am intalnit destul de frecvent in ultima vreme conceptul de "rule of thumb" si in prima faza m-a intrigat. Pe scurt, este o unitate de masura practica, nu e bazata pe stiinta sau pe o masuratoare exacta ci mai degraba pe o aproximare. Are in acest sens o valoare "orientativa". Astfel articolul pe care il adaptez astazi reprezinta un set de sugestii privind organizarea finantelor personale.

Cat de mari ar trebui sa fie datoriile pe care le ai?

Desigur, este preferabil sa nu ai datorii. Cand acest lucru se intampa, este o opinie agreata ca rata lunara in contul datoriilor nu ar trebui sa depaseasca 36% din venitul tau lunar. Te vei simti si mai bine cand vei reduce procentul :)

Cat ar trebui sa dai pe o locuinta?

Se sugereaza ca pretul pe care il dai pe o locuinta sa nu depaseasca mai mult de 3 x venitul tau anual. (Regula a fost gandita pentru sistemul american. Nu stiu in ce masura proportia ramane valabila in cazul sistemului romanesc, raportul dintre salariul anual si pretul unei locuinte fiind oarecum diferit).

Cat ar trebui sa economisesti?

Una dintre cele mai populare reguli de economisire spune ca ar trebui sa economisesti minim 10% din venitul tau. Aceasta regula se aplica pentru a crea un cont pentru cheltuieli neasteptate, educatie sau alte scopuri.

Cat de mare ar trebui sa fie fondul de urgenta?

Fondul de urgenta este utilizat pentru a-ti putea acoperi cheltuielile atunci cand esti lipsit de venit pentru o perioada mai lunga din diverse motive. Se considera ca o familie ar trebui sa dispuna de 3 pana la 6 ori cheltuielile medii ale gospodariei. Astfel, daca cheltuielile tale lunare medii sunt in jurul sumei de 2000 de lei ar trebui sa ai in fondul de urgenta intre 6000 si 12000 de lei.

Am sarit peste sugestiile privind fondul de pensionare, mai imi dau 10-15 ani pana sa ma gandesc la asta. Momentan voi incerca regulile de mai sus.

Articolul original, aici.

O viziune realista asupra pacii

2011-01-30T12:51:00.002+02:00

Inceputuri

2011-01-15T14:31:00.003+02:00

Frumoase mai sunt inceputurile, pacat ca nu putem incepe mereu. Imi zic asta uneori junduind dupa sentimentul acela ( "acesta" pentru azi). Inceputul de an lipovenesc mi-a priit in acest an infinit mai bine decat inceputul de an bine cunoscut. Si azi, pe 2 ianuarie lipovenesc ma simt mult mai in stare sa incep anul, sa reiau blogul, sa-mi fac planuri, sa-mi promit cate-n luna si in stele si sa am puterea sa cred ca ma voi tine de promisiuni.

Si acum, la inceputul meu de an, imi si va urez deja clasica mea urare de fericire:
"pentru a fi fericit ai nevoie de ceva de facut, ceva de iubit si ceva spre care sa nazuiesti. An nou fericit!"

Back in business

2011-01-15T14:04:00.002+02:00